Nobility of Womanhood, my arse

Every now and then, some witty woman writes a cute little article about how women have babies and go through the menstrual cycle because we are so brave and tough and cool and groovy and just a sterling example of nobility and yada yada blah blah.

I am here to tell you, that's crap. We do it because we have no choice. All 7 dwarves have put on red-hot golf shoes and are now doing the fandago in my ovaries. I am in pain from the belly to the knees. I'm weak, wobbly, nauseated, and flowing like Niagra during monsoon season. & don't give me a bunch of guff about Canada not having monsoons or I will kill you.

I do not feel even a tiny bit noble. If I could, I would transfer this condition to nearest male and laugh while I did it.

So if any men are still reading this: Women are not noble. We are in PAIN, and we HATE THE WORLD, and you should BRING US CHOCOLATE and SCRUB THE BATHTUB so we can go soak in it, and you should just generally kiss our butts for a few days. You'll be safer that way.