Saturday, March 19, 2005

It's . . . Felonious Mom!


The crime that shocked the nation take place before your very eyes!

As an ordinary, middle-aged woman and mother becomes a hardened, vicious felon with no change in her daily habits!

At the naivete of bloggers who actually expect their senators, representatives, President, and Supreme Court to treat the US Constitution and the Bill of Rights with respect!

At the depravity that thrives deep within the heart of the notorious Madame Persnickety, a secret member of the McCain-Feingold Insurrection and Shameless Linker to Political Websites!

. . . The following preview brought to you by PetSmart and Globastat . . .

"We should sue for false advertising!" she typed, on her unregistered Compaq keyboard. Russ Feingold's site claims he protects civil liberties and civil rights, but really he is a a nefarious tyrant! He and his buddy, the bitter and power-mad John McCain! Vile Creatures! Have they never heard of a declaratory and restrictive clause!?"

Her terry-cloth robe flapped excitedly in the wind; her glow-in-the-dark bunny slippers glowed fiercely with the heat of her heart.

"Ye Gads!!" The politicians and media wept and trembled in terror. "Are there none to stop this madwoman? Who will saaavve us?"

Out leap
McCain and Feingold to the rescue! Mild-mannered senators by day; fearless freedom-stompers by night - will the shush & shut-down duo be able to stop this dastardly criminal?

Tune in the next time I feel like typing this much for . . .

Felonious Mom!

To report this violation of the BiPartison Campaign Reform Act of 2002, please file a written complaint with the Federal Election Commission. The complaint must be made in writing, and sent to the Office of General Counsel, Federal Election Commission, 999 E Street, N.W., Washington, D.C. 20463. The original must be submitted along with three copies, if possible. Facsimile transmissions are not acceptable.

A complaint must comply with certain requirements. It must:

Provide the full name and address of the person filing the complaint (called the complainant); and
Be signed, sworn to and notarized. This means that the notary public's certificate must say "...signed and sworn to before me..."

Not that I am bitter.

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