Which cat would you kill?

Cast of Characters:

Alison: minimum 18 years old, possibly more. Slightly arthritic, borderline diabetic, none of which drastically interferes with her daily life. Loves her human, spits at her son. Alison has been in the household since 1995. Occasionally vomits inside, never goes to the bathroom inside except in the litterbox. Likes to carry shoes around the house.

Smokey: 16 years old. Possible thyroid problem indicated by low weight and some hair loss. Does not drastically interfere with his daily life. Loves his human, tolerates his mother, Alison. Smokey has also been in the household since 1995. He and Alison were a package deal. Occasionally vomits inside, never goes to the bathroom inside except in the litterbox.

Straycat: about 7 weeks old. Found last week under a rosebush. Sweet, loving, healthy. Learns quickly - she only had to be hit with the water pistol once to stop climbing screens. Usual kitten tendencies but understands and uses the litterbox.

So you've probably figured it out - Alison and Smokey are established cats, Straycat is the new kid on the block. I have tried to find a home for Straycat - no luck. I tried the no-kill shelter. They're full and not taking any more. I put up signs around the neighborhood and have been checking the local paper. Nada. I think Straycat is as sweet as apple pie, but Smokey and Alison disagree. Smokey hisses and hunts, but stops with a hit from the squirtgun. Alison hunts and attacks, and doesn't stop for nothin', nobody, nohow, no way. She has to be bodily removed. Straycat wants to be friends with whatever creature she sees, is getting more neurotic by the minute, thanks primarily to Alison.

Do not tell me "they'll work it out." I know cats; they'll work it out when Alison has killed Straycat. Smokey and Straycat, yeah maybe. Alison and Straycat? Not gonna happen.

I, too, am getting more neurotic by the minute. I can't spend every second of my day chasing cats. At some point, I need to work, eat, and sleep. Something's gotta give, or more accurately, some one's gotta go.

If I take Alison to the pound, she is too old to be adopted. Straycat's chances aren't much better, only 10%. Realistically, odds are that whoever goes will be put down.

Alison is old and will probably die in a few years anyway, while Straycat has her life ahead of her.

Alison is trained and well-behaved. Straycat is a kitten and will need discipline.

If Alison dies, Smokey's chances of following her to the pound are probably 50/50. If Straycat dies, Smokey's ok.

Alison is the aggressor here. Straycat is blameless.

Alison probably feels that Straycat is an interloper in Alison's territory. I have news for Alison and for all you bunny-huggers out there: it's my territory. Alison (and Smokey and Straycat) are here by my goodwill.

So which cat would you take to the pound?